Porn, Betrayal, Sex and the Experts — PBSE

Is it My Job to Educate My Addict Partner about My Betrayal Trauma & My Boundaries?

(Episode 348)  A betrayed partner who has a history of neglect, abuse, people-pleasing, or self-abandonment may find it especially difficult to identify and defend her ow

Can my Partner with 2 Decades of Porn Use & Years of Secrecy & Lying Genuinely Recover?

In Episode 347, a betrayed partner who recently ended a three-year relationship asks whether her former partner can genuinely recover after more than two decades of compu

If He Doesn't Think Porn Is Bad, Can He Still Truly Recover??

In Episode 346, a betrayed partner wonders whether her husband can genuinely recover from pornography addiction when he admits that lying, hiding, gaslighting, and hurtin

My Addiction Shattered My Wife; She Wants a Divorce, but I Don't. Now What?!

In episode 345, a couple is facing the enormous aftermath of pornography addiction, sexual betrayal, deception, failed disclosure, and trickle truth. The husband reports

After his Gaslighting, Betrayal and Integrity Abuse, My Intuition is Broken!

Episode 344—Long-term betrayal and integrity abuse can severely disrupt a betrayed partner’s ability to trust her own perceptions. After repeatedly sensing that something

He's Honest About Relapses, But His Spiraling Shame and Neediness Cycle is Exhausting!

The partner in this situation (Episode 343) recognizes that her husband’s honesty about two recent relapses represents meaningful progress after years of pornography use,

Why Do I Keep Lying to My Partner About the Stupidest Little Things?!

PBSE, Episode 342—Lying in addiction can take many forms, including outright denial, omission, minimization, exaggeration, deflection, gaslighting, and carefully construc

From Shame and Survival to Honesty and Wholeness—Is Real Lasting Change Possible?

A person who has struggled with addiction for many years may begin to believe that he is uniquely broken and incapable of lasting change. Repeated relapses, betrayal, dam

When His Recovery Journey Is Destroying Her Healing Journey

In this episode (340), we respond to a deeply painful submission from a betrayed partner who is trying to determine whether she can stay in a marriage where her husband’s

Sexualized Media, Movies & Other Content—Can They Ever Be Safe Again in True Recovery?

In this episode (339), we explore whether sexualized media, movies with nudity, provocative social media, and other triggering content can ever be considered “safe” again

When Porn Addiction Evolves into AI Fantasy Using the Partner as the “Character”

In this episode (338), we explore a new but increasingly common form of betrayal: porn addiction escalating into AI-generated sexual fantasy, including the use of a partn

What to Do When an Addict Uses Recovery to Avoid Caring About His Partner?

This episode (#337) addresses the painful experience of a betrayed partner whose husband claims he is “in recovery” after a relapse, but continues to severely lack empath

Betrayal Trauma, Childhood Trauma & My Own Addiction—Where Do I Even Start?

This episode (336) explores the painful and complicated reality of a young betrayed partner who is trying to recover from betrayal trauma while also carrying childhood tr

Healthy Sexuality or Pornified Performance? Navigating Lingerie, Fantasies, Kinks, & Authentic Intimacy in Recovery

In this episode (335), we respond to a courageous submission from a betrayed partner who is navigating early recovery with her partner after multiple discovery days. Both

Am I REALLY Recovering—Or Just Using My Partner Instead of Porn?

In Episode 334, we respond to a submission from a man in early recovery who discovered, with honesty and concern, that he may be relying on his partner sexually in order

"Why Do Intrusive Mental Images Still Hit Me—Even Years Into His Recovery?"

In this episode (#333), we address a question from a betrayed partner who is about three years into sex addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing with her partner. A

Half-In, Half-Out Recovery: He Says He’s Changing but Keeps the “Addiction Door” Cracked Open

In this PBSE episode (#332), we explore what it means when an addict says he is changing but continues to keep the “addiction door” cracked open. A betrayed partner may s

If He will NOT face His Porn Addiction—You as a Partner MUST find Your Voice NOW!

In this episode (#331), we respond to a betrayed partner who discovered her husband’s ongoing porn use while she was pregnant and has since caught him multiple times in t

No D-Day, No Disclosure—But I KNOW I’ve Been Betrayed: Healing from Integrity Abuse When the Truth Is Still Hidden

In Episode 330, Mark & Steve address a uniquely painful and confusing experience for many betrayed partners: living with a deep sense of betrayal and trauma without ever

We Want a Family, But He Just Disclosed His Porn Addiction—Now What?

In this episode (329), Mark and Steve address a submission from a betrayed wife whose husband has recently disclosed a porn addiction just as they were preparing to start